I have lost trust in someone before. I was in a three year long relationship where my boyfriend lied and cheated on me. When someone close to
your lies and you loose your trust in them, it makes you feel insecure. It is
hard for you to put your trust in someone again, because nobody wants to feel
pain again. The trust was restored overtime, but never was 100% the same. We
had, as the book puts it, an unhealthy level of trust. Once you have distrust
in someone, it is hard to build that trust up again. The way to build that
trust up is to slowly open up again, and when you have already lost that trust
within an individual it is hard to communicate things that are personal. I also
feel that once that trust suffers, an act of powerful speech definitely plays a
role in a relationship. When you feel insecure after being lied too and your
trust being lost, I think a form of powerless speech takes over the
relationships communication. Powerless speech simply means to feel uncertain or
unsure of onself.
Hi Britt Victoria,
ReplyDeleteI thought you had a great post about trust. I’m sorry about the situation you explained. I agree with you that it’s hard to trust someone, when someone close to you breaks that trust. It hurts a lot when someone who you care about breaks your trust, and it takes time for you to regain trust in others. You had a good point that the way to build trust up again, is to slowly open up. I also agree with you that once you are lied to, you feel insecure and it’s like a form of powerless speech that takes over the relationship communication.
Hey Brittany,
ReplyDeleteYou did a great job of showing an example of losing someone’s trust. I also agree that if your partner lied and cheat on you that it would hard to still trust that person. As the book states trust is the “belief that another is benevolent or honest toward the trusting individual, and that the other person’s caring transcends any direct benefits the other receives as a result of caring”. It appears that in this situation the person doing the cheating and lying is not the definition of trust. Thank you sharing your experience about losing someone’s trust, it was very insightful.
BrittVictoria,
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear about the situation you had to deal with. Relationship problems are no fun and make things harder going forward, as you think potential interests will make the same mistake. I've had friends that have gone through what you described. It was hard for them and they couldn't believe that their significant other would hurt them that bad. I agree with your point that once you distrust someone, it is hard to get things back where they previously were. In the situation I described in my post, it took months for me to be comfortable sharing information with my friend.
Hi Britt Victoria, I can understand how that must have been a difficult time for you. When someone betrays your trust it is really an awful experience to go through. It must have been hard to open back up again after someone you have placed all of your trust in betrays you like that. I too feel that once a trust is broken it will never be 100% again. There will always be a linger of doubt in the back of your head. I think you did a great job answering this question, and a great job with how honest you were about your own experience.
ReplyDelete