The book talks about verbal aggressive
communication being a persons way of attacking the self-concept of another
person in order to cause psycholical pain for the other(Pg. 52). This is where
I think the line is drawn and this becomes abusive. By verbally attacking your
child you are simply making them fear you, which doesn’t allow for good
communication between the parents and the child. When you are pushing your
child you are causing physical damage. However, causing mental damage, by
verbally attacking someone can be just as a damaging to a child’s self esteem.
I think that disciplining a child involves teaching them a lesson, but you still
want them to respect you. I think that people overstep their paternal authority
when they want to cause physical pain to their child, or they are just
attacking their child and putting their child down. Parents that are abusive
are more than likely causing their child to become more violent and most of the
time when parents are abusive they aren’t listening to their child, which makes
children feel like they aren’t wanted. Down the road I think parents that are
abusive cause communication issues for their children and increase their children’s
odds of repeating their parents abusive ways.
Hello Britt Victoria, I can agree with you when parents decide to verbally attacking a child it does hurt them in so many aspects, emotionally, psychologically, and as you mentioned, it can make them fear their parents in a negative way. You want your child to respect you and not fear you. I also agree that physical discipline does not teach the child a lesson but rather teaching them that hitting is ok. I completely agree with you that some parents overstep their paternal authority when using negative reinforcement and discipline. It only makes a child rebel against what the parents want them to do. I work in a preschool and I see all sorts of different types of discipline tactics parents use to make their children listen to them. The tactics I’ve seen that really work are the parents that are firm but not physically & verbally aggressive or abusive. They talk to them in an appropriate manner and help them understand why what they did was wrong. It was nice reading your thoughts on this important topic.
ReplyDeleteGood job!
Britt Victoria,
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with you this week. I think that fear is not something that should be used on a child. By attacking any child physically or verbally to the point of causing fear, they are not learning. If it is meant to teach them a lesson for doing something wrong, they are not learning why it is wrong and why they shouldn’t do it. They are just learning that if they do that, they will get a scary reaction. When it comes to what you mentioned about respect, I agree as well. There is a big difference between fear and respect. I respect my parents but I always remember knowing kids who feared their parents. I remember them not having a close relationship with their parents and it made me feel bad because truthfully, my mom is my best friend and I wouldn’t want that any differently.